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Yesterday was our fourth anniversary of moving to Tenerife and last night, over a celebratory €2.20 bottle of Cava (we’re not afraid to push the boat out when the occasion calls for it), we got to thinking about what we’d achieved.Cava in the sun, bliss

Number 1: Speak Spanish.
Our one year’s worth of night school at the Cervantes Institute in Manchester before we moved here had given us a good grounding in the language. Unfortunately, ground level’s pretty much where we still are. We can confidently get by in most situations that are initiated by ourselves, but if the phone rings we head into the ever-descending hell of “no entiendo, puedes repetir” which literally translates as “I don’t understand, can you say it again” but metaphorically says “I’m stalling ‘cos I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about”.  And watching ‘Cuéntame Cómo Pasó’ on Thursday nights requires a dictionary at hand and an active imagination as to what’s actually happening on the screen. Last year we had the local priest down as having the hots for the beautiful daughter. As it turned out, we were right about that one.

Number 2: Earn a Living.
Well, if we change the word ‘earn’ to ‘scratch’ then we’re making good progress against that one.

Number 3: Learn to Salsa.
After innumerable Saturday nights crushed against the bar in Azucar, clutching a mojito and watching couples swirl and sashay in synchronised, sexual oscillation, we are DEFINITELY going to get lessons as soon as we can afford them (see number 2).

Number 4: Earn a living from writing.
(See number 2)

Number 5: Be happy.
Yeh! A big, fat tick goes into the number 5 column and the cork comes out of another bottle of Cava. After all, what’s the use of the other four if you can’t tick number 5?

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